Sunday funnies........

[Tomk_]

[geewhiz]

[Guns]

Someone asked the other day,

'What was your favorite fast food when you were growing up?'

'We didn't have fast food when I was growing up,'

I informed him, 'All the food was slow.'

'C'mon, seriously. Where did you eat?'

'It was a place called 'at home,' I explained!

'Mom cooked every day and when Dad got home from
work, we sat down together at the dining room table, & if I didn't like what she
put on my plate, I was allowed to sit there until I did like it.'

By this time, the kid was laughing so hard I was afraid he was going to suffer
serious internal damage, so I didn't tell him the part about how I had to
have permission to leave the table.

Here are some other things I would have told him about my childhood if I
figured his system could have handled it:

Some parents NEVER owned their own house, wore Levis, set foot on a golf course,
traveled out of the country or had a credit card.

My parents never drove me to school. I had a bicycle that weighed probably 50
pounds, and only had one speed, (slow)..m

We didn't have a television in our house until I was 10. It was, of course, black
and white, and the station went off the air at 11, after playing the national anthem

and a poem about God. It came back on the air at about 6 a.m. and there was usually a locally produced news and farm show on, featuring local people....

I never had a telephone in my room. The only phone was on a party line. Before you
could dial, you had to listen and make sure some people you didn't know
weren't already using the line.

Pizzas were not delivered to our home... But milk was & so was
bread.

All newspapers were delivered by boys and all boys delivered newspapers --my brother
delivered a newspaper, six days a week. He had to get up at 5AM every morning.

Movie stars kissed with their mouths shut. At least, they did in the movies! There
were no movie ratings because all movies were responsibly produced for
everyone to enjoy viewing, without profanity or violence or most anything
offensive.

If you grew up in a generation before there was fast food, you may want to
share some of these memories with your children or grandchildren. Just
don't blame me if they bust a gut laughing.

Growing up isn't what it used to be, is it?

MEMORIES:

My Dad is cleaning out my grandmother's house (she died in December) and he brought me an old Royal Crown Cola bottle. In the bottle top was a stopper with a
bunch of holes in it. I knew immediately what it was, but my daughter had
no idea. She thought they had tried to make it a salt shaker or something.
I knew it as the bottle that sat on the end of the ironing board to
'sprinkle' clothes with because we didn't have steam irons. Man, I am
old..

How many do you remember?

Head lights dimmer switches on the floor..
Ignition switches on the dashboard..
Pant leg clips for bicycles without chain guards.
Soldering irons you heat on a gas burner.
Using hand signals for cars without turn signals.

Older Than Dirt Quiz:

Count all the ones that you remember, NOT the ones you
were told about!

Ratings at the bottom..

1. Candy
cigarettes
2. Coffee shops
with tableside juke boxes
3. Home milk
delivery in glass bottles
4. Party lines on
the telephones
5. Newsreels
before the movie
6. TV test patterns that came
on at night after the last show and were there until TV shows started
again in the morning. (there were only 3 channels!! [if you were fortunate])
7. Peashooters
8. Howdy Doody
9. 45 RPM records

10. 78 rpm records
11. Hi-fi records 33 1/3 rpm
12. Metal ice trays with lever
13. Blue flashbulb
14. Cork popguns
15. Studebakers
16. Wash tub wringers

If you remembered 0-3 = You're still young
If you remembered 3-6 = You are getting older
If you remembered 7-10 = Don't tell your age, &
If you remembered 11-16 = You're older than dirt !!!

THAT'S ME!!!

I might be older than dirt but those memories are some of the best parts of my life.

[caintry_boy]

Yup! Older than dirt, I remember all 16...

 

 

 

 

[Tomk_]

Im still older than dirt, but I only got 14. I never saw a newsreel before a movie, but then again, I never went to a movie theater until the mid to late 70's. And though I was well aware of Howdy Doody, we didn't have a TV so I saw my first Dobie Gillis, Leave it to Beaver, Munsters, etc. part way through college in 1979 or 1980 and actually saw my first Howdy Doody in the 90's or later.

 

Some of the others still exist, I have a wash tub ringer (rarely use it anymore), my home phone was a party line until I had it disconnected a few years ago. I have 45, 33 1/3, and 78 rpm albums. I know of two diners that still have table juke boxes. I have a drawer with flashbulbs (and I mean the real ones. Not those magic cubes - which I have a few of also). I thought newtwork channels still have test patterns. Peashooters will exists as long as they keep making straws, but I also have an aluminum blow gun that is great for a variety of projectiles, including some darts.

[Jacee]

mmm.. 1977 Cadillac Coupe DeVille and the "dimmer switch was on the floor" (I loved that feature) ... not older than dirt!

[KurtBleach]

1, 2, 6, 9, 11, 12, 13.

[Guns]

A Honda mechanic was removing a cylinder head from the motor of a Honda when he spotted a well-known cardiologist in his shop. The cardiologist was there waiting for the service manager to come and take a look at his car when the mechanic shouted across the garage, "Hey Doc, want to take a look at this?”

The cardiologist, a bit surprised walked over to where the mechanic was working on the Honda.

The mechanic straightened up, wiped his hands on a rag and asked, "So Doc, look at this engine. I opened its heart, took the valves out, repaired or replaced anything damaged, and then put everything back in, and when I finished, it worked just like new. So how is it that I make $24,000 a year and you make $1.7M when you and I are doing basically the same work?

The cardiologist paused, leaned over, and then whispered to the mechanic...."Try doing it with the engine running."

[caintry_boy]

A Honda mechanic was removing a cylinder head from the motor of a Honda when he spotted a well-known cardiologist in his shop. The cardiologist was there waiting for the service manager to come and take a look at his car when the mechanic shouted across the garage, "Hey Doc, want to take a look at this?”

 

The cardiologist, a bit surprised walked over to where the mechanic was working on the Honda.

 

The mechanic straightened up, wiped his hands on a rag and asked, "So Doc, look at this engine. I opened its heart, took the valves out, repaired or replaced anything damaged, and then put everything back in, and when I finished, it worked just like new. So how is it that I make $24,000 a year and you make $1.7M when you and I are doing basically the same work?

 

The cardiologist paused, leaned over, and then whispered to the mechanic...."Try doing it with the engine running."

 

 

 

 

 

 

[Jacee]

Yep ^^^^^

[caintry_boy]

 

 

 

 

 

[Juliet]

lol

[Jacee]

Looks like we have a mixed bag of weather today.

[Tomk_]

It's the wind I hate. A couple of years ago a 75 mph gust put a tree on my house on New Years Day (a below zero day). It only took about 6 hours to cut up the tree and remove it, but it took 15 hours to get power back. I don't like predictions of 50mph or above.

Strong winds this afternoon and tonight.
A strong Pacific storm will continue to move through the Interior Northwest this afternoon and tonight. The Storm Center will move across British Columbia, but pressure gradients will be very tight across Southeast Washington and portions of Northeast and Central Oregon. These pressure gradients, combined with strong winds aloft, will cause strong surface winds and wind gusts. Winds will cause areas of blowing dust over South Central Washington.
High Wind Warning remains in effect until 4 AM PST Wednesday.

• Winds: southwest 25 to 45 mph with gusts up to 60 mph.
• Timing: winds will continue to increase, peaking this afternoon and evening. Strong gusts will be possible at any time today and tonight.
• Impacts: .NUMEROUS downed trees and power lines will result in power outages. Loose Objects may become airborne. Driving will be difficult especially for high profile vehicles.

[KurtBleach]

A Honda mechanic was removing a cylinder head from the motor of a Honda when he spotted a well-known cardiologist in his shop. The cardiologist was there waiting for the service manager to come and take a look at his car when the mechanic shouted across the garage, "Hey Doc, want to take a look at this?”

 

The cardiologist, a bit surprised walked over to where the mechanic was working on the Honda.

 

The mechanic straightened up, wiped his hands on a rag and asked, "So Doc, look at this engine. I opened its heart, took the valves out, repaired or replaced anything damaged, and then put everything back in, and when I finished, it worked just like new. So how is it that I make $24,000 a year and you make $1.7M when you and I are doing basically the same work?

 

The cardiologist paused, leaned over, and then whispered to the mechanic...."Try doing it with the engine running."

And that's what they are doing w/Roger, no? Still alive Rog, that is cool. So are my folks.

[Humbluemoon]

A young native guy brings home his new gf to meet his parents. After dinner his dad takes him out side kicks his :filtered: and scolds him. " you can not marry that girl ". He says. ...why not? The son argues...cause she is your sister! The dad claims. 20 yrs ago me n her mom spent a summer on the pow wow trail that's how she came to be. .the son gets really mad at his dad and goes for a walk almost in tears his mom walks to him and asks. What's the matter my boy?? After her son explains what dad told him..she goes. ". Ahhh don't listening to that old fart, he's not your real dad anyway. ! Lol ....your Fri. Joke. Have a great wkend you all

[caintry_boy]

 

 

 

 

[Guns]

Be sure to listen after she says Grace! A sweet old lady is asked to say Grace at a gathering of "Seniors at Home" caregivers, and she brought down the house about 90 seconds into her prayer. Enjoy!

http://stg.do/9i0c

[caintry_boy]

Be sure to listen after she says Grace! A sweet old lady is asked to say Grace at a gathering of "Seniors at Home" caregivers, and she brought down the house about 90 seconds into her prayer. Enjoy!

 

http://stg.do/9i0c

:clap:

 

 

 

 

[caintry_boy]

 

 

 

 

[Juliet]

LOL!

[Tomk_]

[Y kawika]

 

Y

[IntelGuy]

[Bruce]