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I Am Old (What the Class of 2014 Will Be Like—Mind The Gap)


From Reader's Digest April 2011


1. What is “cursive”?

2. E-mail is just too slow.

3. “Caramel macchiato” and “venti half-caff vanilla latte” have always been street-corner lingo.

4. John McEnroe has never played professional tennis.

5. Clint Eastwood is better known as a sensitive director than as Dirty Harry.

6. Fergie is a pop singer, not a princess.

7. They have never twisted a coiled handset wire aimlessly around ther wrist while chatting on the phone.

8. Unless they found one in their grandparents' closet, they have never seen a carousel of Kodachrome slides.

9. Computers have never lacked a CD-ROM disc drive.

10. Czechoslovakia never existed.

11. Nirvana is on the classic oldies station.

12. Toothpaste tubes have always stood up on their caps.

13. Rock bands have always played at presidential inaugural parties.


More in the book: The Mindset Lists of American History


I retired from teaching in 2009—students didn't get my Mork and Mindy jokes, among others.

Me: Mircowaves are too slow.



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