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bob3160

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If you can start the day without caffeine,

 

If you can always be cheerful, ignoring aches and pains,

 

If you can resist complaining and boring people with your troubles,

 

If you can eat the same food every day and be grateful for it,

 

If you can understand when your loved ones are too busy to give you any time,

 

If you can take criticism and blame without resentment ,

 

If you can conquer tension without medical help,

 

If you can relax without liquor,

 

If you can sleep without the aid of drugs,

 

 

 

 

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...Then You Are Probably The Family Dog!

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Why Some Men Have Dogs And Not Wives:

 

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1. The later you are, the more excited your dogs are to see you.

 

2. Dogs don't notice if you call them by another dog's name.

 

3. Dogs like it if you leave a lot of things on the floor.

 

4. A dog's parents never visit.

 

5. Dogs agree that you have to raise your voice to get your point across.

 

6. You never have to wait for a dog; they're ready to go 24 hours a day.

 

7. Dogs find you amusing when you're drunk..

 

8. Dogs like to go hunting and fishing.

 

9. Dogs don't wake you up at night to ask, "If I died, would you get another dog?"

 

10. If a dog has babies, you can put an ad in the paper and give them away.

 

11. A dog will let you put a studded collar on it without calling you a pervert.

 

12. If a dog smells another dog on you, they don't get mad. They just think it's

 

interesting.

 

13. Dogs like to ride in the back of a pickup truck.

 

14. If a dog leaves, it won't take half of your stuff.

 

To test this theory:

Lock your wife and your dog in the garage for an hour. Then open it and see who's

happy to see you.

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